Wednesday, October 18, 2017

mom

i could talk about everybody that has got my back
knowing that they could leave me
and possibly turn around and come back
knowing from the very beginning i probably slept against your back
knowing that you yelling at me always kept me on track 
even in my heartbreak you never forsake or ever slack
you always helped me picked out my school clothes and back pack
our relationship is an equation that they'll never crack
first best friend 
to the end
my mom

Shattered

It was all a dream, huh?
I was fine, to think my own thoughts
To feel my own feels
Guarded
Soft hearted
Never knowing that you could see me
Though I would never say a word
Absurd, though it was
Because we were in a different time and space
I face
The reality
Of things never being the same
You spoke words better left
And I just have to manage
My thoughts
My feelings
Because to think I could just feel
Without consequence
Is a mirror
That has been shattered.

Thursday, September 7, 2017

Thanks But No Thanks

I can't be the one you need
Because it isn't about you
My light doesn't shine
To give you power
The access to my brilliance
Is an accident
I am not here for you
I appreciate your appreciation
Though I am under no obligation
Or inclination
To accept your offer.

Thursday, May 19, 2016

To-Do

Sleep
Work
Eat
Study.
Sleep
Work
Eat
Study.
Sleep
Work
Eat
Study.
Sleep
Work
Eat
Study.

No time to breathe.

Sleep
Work
Eat
Study.
Sleep
Work
Eat
Study.
Sleep
Work
Eat
Study.

No time to be.

Friday, May 6, 2016

What It's Like To Be Me

What is it like to be me?
I don't really expect to see many girls like me on the TV
But it's a good thing I don't watch
Bombarded by messages about who I should be and what I should have
It's a good thing I like who I am and what I've got
I have gotten used to being ignored and silence when talking about issues
But it's a good thing I'm stubborn and loud
Groupthink gets people into sticky situations
So it's okay I don't follow the crowd
I work hard and pray harder
There's so much to be done
Sometimes I struggle to take a breath
And oftentimes I wonder
How I keep from from going under
What part of me is left?
What is it like to be me?
Exhausted
Yet grateful
Running from pillar to post
Some days I'm victorious
And others I could just cry
But if anything
I have learned
Both a triumph
And a trial
Start with a try.

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

Airtight Exchange (#30)

I wish I was
Strong enough to
Live in a vacuum
Then maybe I could live
Then maybe I could love
Like pure
Love like free
Because this love was fragile
Tenuous
Like a wet paper towel
It could only wipe up the mess if you set it the right way
But we got tangled up and we broke
I write this with no malice
Because it just is
Now
Out here in the air

bewitched (#29)

oh, you
you think you know me so well
you have me under your spell
hell, i'll admit
that it
was hard to resist
your singular charm
i didn't see the harm
of saying yes
after saying no so many times
just tired of being guarded
and lonely-hearted
nobody understands how you did it
least of all me
because i never thought that i was the type
i believed my own hype
so when they ask me
i tell them to ask you
because clearly i have no clue
how you
have me bewitched.